Stalker Mail

Wednesday · December 12, 2001 · 02:58 PM

An anonymous Stalker wrote: You’re more funny than Three Eyed Duck. You should take over his website.

At first I thought this said I was more funny than a three eyed duck. That is totally untrue. Three eyed ducks tend to be pretty good with a punch line – they’re not to be trifled with.

Then I checked out the link. I gotta tell you there’s something seriously wrong with a guy whose favorite piece of change is a nickel. Compare those chunksters with the thin elegance of the dime – in fact compare two of them to a dime and you’ll see how bad the nickel can be.

There’s plenty of room on the web for more than one guy that writes humorous bloggings. Just like there’s room for more than one twenty-something girl with relationship problems. Just like there’s room for bitter un-employed dot-commers, vegans, wiccas, militant feminists, etc, etc.

I’m going to leave well enough alone, thanks. Plus there’s a chance he could kick my ass. Especially if he has a sock full of nickels – those things are heavy…